Gratitude

I’ve been thinking about where to place this topic since I’ve been working through my tools in a somewhat chronological order. Gratitude is the prevailing sentiment that has, and continues to, permeate everything, the thought that is applied first. It has been there since this all started (and for years and years before) and has grown into something much larger. If I could only choose one of my tools it would be this one. Additionally, none of the others work the same without it.

Gratitude for the Gift

In the beginning, it was very simple. I have always felt that the discovery of the dysplasia and everything connected to it was a gift, a chance to have the body I’ve never had, a chance to perform better, a chance to be whole – for that I was grateful. The surgeries and recoveries would be work, a setback of a few years, but the gift! I am so grateful for all of it!

With each roadblock, I’ve paused to reframe, to find the gratitude. It would be easy to be upset, deflated, even angry, but there’s been opportunity in every part. Gratitude for the process, gratitude for the detours, I have a special path that is all mine to discover. Sometimes the roadblocks have led to new physical discoveries, but most often I’ve been physically grounded and left to face my inner self and do the work there. I’m grateful for that because otherwise I would have surely not done the work. Roadblocks, repeated surgeries, repeated recoveries, these have all been times to dig deeper. Read more books, listen to more podcasts, talk to more people, consider new ideas and perspectives, grow. I’m grateful for this time!

Perhaps it was tied to the idea that was planted in my mind that the pelvis was the bowl of my soul, but I felt as if this whole process was a chance to rebuild myself from scratch. Not just physically, but mentally, emotionally, wholly.

I couldn’t undo my wrongs, but I could start fresh, repair, renew, tend to all parts of me and those around me that I had pushed aside. This was a massive turning point in my life that I needed, and for that I am profoundly grateful.

Gratitude sets my thoughts and energy outwards, towards others, minimizing whatever I’m feeling or thinking, offering real perspective. Entire life reboot. Thank you, universe.

My gratitude practice at first was not a formal practice, but rather more of a daily noticing, reminders, mantra, organic, drawn upon when needed. But I noticed how powerful it was so I looked into it more and a whole world opened up!

There is so much work that has been done in the field of the science of gratitude! Who knew?

A few excellent reads to whet your appetite:

This article

And this one

Dig in from there because there’s an abundance of science behind gratitude.

On days where I’m not feeling good, not moving well, everything seems upside down, I’m lying on the floor not even enjoying a normally delicious savasana, what, the, fork – I go to gratitude.

I find one thing to be grateful for. “I’m grateful for the floor I’m lying on.”

This leads to finding more things to be grateful for. “I’m grateful for this breath. I’m grateful for my family giving me the time and space to be lying on the floor. I’m grateful I was even able to get down onto the floor in the first place.”

And so it grows and I can always pull myself back to the world and feeling better.

Gratitude November

In November of 2020 I gathered some friends for a Gratitude November gratitude practice group. It fit with Thanksgiving being in November, so that was the challenge for the month. Each day we would share three things we were grateful for publicly within our group. It could be anything, really – something deep or not at all, whatever was on your mind. It was important that it was three things rather than one, causing us to pause and think carefully. This turned out to be a beautiful month of not just thinking of and sharing our own gratitudes, but also getting to appreciate the shares of everyone else, compounding the gratitude effect. Grab some friends and family and try it! Don’t even wait for November!

Concurrent to the group, David and I wrote daily in this journal. We thought it would be fun to do and then share with each other once a week out on a brunch date. Meaningful alone time = win! This proved to be one of the best ideas, launching into learning more about each other than we could have ever expected, deeper connection, all rooted in gratitude.

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I did a mini self-portrait project on our dates. Here is one example:

We also read these books:

Thanks! How the New Science of Gratitude Can Make You Happier, Robert A. Emmons, Ph.D.
The Little Book of Gratitude, Robert A. Emmons, Ph.D.

The gratitudes group continued into December with Random Acts of Kindness but it was difficult to stop the gratitude practice, so those were added most days, too!

I’ve continued the daily writing of three gratitudes, in fact it is the very first thing I write every morning. It is very easy to write three new things and expand upon them; I could write on gratitude all day long. But, I do only the three in concrete form and it sets my mind on the path to mentally note and live in gratitude all day long, or at least have the seeds planted on my not so great days. (I am human and really blow it some days.)

I’m grateful for the gift of this entire experience. It is making me the best version of myself in every way.

I’m grateful for my Dr, his team, and all of my medical caretakers. I have never worried about my physical care and have felt 100% certain that we will all work through it to the end, no matter how long it takes.

I’m grateful for my family for enduring it all with me, following my lead on running the mile we’re in, and understanding that the obstacle is the way. I’m grateful for the space and time you have given me.

I’m grateful for my friends being themselves which is exactly who I’ve needed. I’m grateful to you for pushing me to be my best and letting me do the same for you.

I’m grateful for having the courage to write and share all of this with you.

I’m grateful for gratitude.

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