Before going to see my hip and pelvis surgeon, I had a few other stops. I really had no idea what was going on with my body so I did a lot of searching before discovering what the true issues were.
One of my first stops was with a birth trauma PT. I thought that maybe my daughter’s birth caused damage – the timing certainly fit. In reading her blog, it made a lot of sense that my pelvis was out of whack and had not returned to its normal position post-partum.
“When we realize the pelvis is our energetic foundation for our body and life, when it is open and unbalanced we don’t have a solid foundation. One client felt like energetically she was walking around with her energy just flowing out full blast, like both faucets handles turned on and water spilling out with no container to hold it. When you can’t hold and contain your energy within you, it can feel a little unsettling.”
Lynn Schulte-Leech, PT
I first read this over three years ago, in the dark late one night in bed while scouring the internet for answers. Holy cow, is this what was happening to me? My foundation was certainly not solid. Not physically OR energetically. I was a leaky faucet.
Looking at “energy” a few ways, I was literally working with sloppy joints, unable to efficiently move energy through my body. But also, in a more metaphysical/spiritual way, was my life force/soul energy going every which way? (I’m super not versed in all of that so forgive my stupid sounding language.)
I met Lynn and we had multiple visits, seeming to make progress in that regard, but at the same time I was getting the CTs and MRIs done and we could see the structural issues of dysplasia, resultant joint damage, and pubic joint damage. In any case, working with her planted the seeds of how this is all connected to my WHOLE self, not just my physical self.
Questions
When I met with my surgeon to ask my questions, I went in wondering if his work would have an impact on my soul. I know that sounds heavily woo-woo for me, but I wondered. After working with Lynn I came to think of my pelvis as the bowl for my soul so I had to wonder what impact other than physical this would have on me. I imagined it would change how I feel, stand, my center of gravity and therefore my center of energy, so it seemed logical that this would all impact me as a whole.
Then I had that meeting with my doctor and came away feeling 100% that it would just be physical, remodeling the house, omg I was such a weirdo for thinking anything else. This is why I treated it that way for the first year or so. I did the surgeries and then attacked my recoveries purely from a physical standpoint.
But why did I keep having problems? Why were the capsules locking up? Why did I have such scarring? Did I need to work even harder? More surgeries. More work. I felt like I was banging my head against the wall.
Yes, I 100% believe that the capsules were locking up to protect the pubic joint and that if we had done the surgeries in a different order (topic for another day) we would have had a different outcome, but I also believe there was more going on here than just the physical.
Think Again
In the beginning of 2020 I started to think differently about my approach. It was time to work on the inner me, to create congruency between all parts of me.
My initial thought before we began any of the work was that the physical change would/could suddenly change my whole self, just like that. Ta-da! What I’ve come to see is that concurrent to the physical changes, I’ve done the WORK to change the rest of me. There’s no ta-da, it has taken actually doing the work. That is the power in this.
My leaky hip joint faucets are now running smoothly and the pubic joint is growing more stable every day. I have a lot more healing to go but already the difference is remarkable. Additionally, I’m working on my other life foundations. I’m achieving TRUE balance and efficient energy transfer.
The next parts of this blog will be about my tools of internal work and integration.
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