Success of every kind is not linear. Business, life, everything! Of course, my focus today is on healing and recovery, but feel free to apply my words to anything and everything in life.
I hear of and see patients getting frustrated when their surgery/recovery path doesn’t “as planned.” Maybe their healing is slower than they expected, slower than someone else’s (turn off social media!), or they’re running into other setbacks. Maybe they learn that they need more surgery. We are human, so it is natural to feel disappointment. Today I’m going to flip that upside down, offering different perspectives.
Success Is Not Linear
Everyone says it, it sounds cliché, but nobody expects it will actually apply to them. There’s the possibility that things could go exactly as planned, so that’s what we expect for ourselves – anything other than that is what happens to “other people.”
Guess what?
We are ALL “other people.” NOBODY’S success comes on the perfectly proposed plan. So, get comfortable with your uniqueness, buckle up, and enjoy the ride. It is going to be interesting and decidedly yours, as awesome as you choose to make it.
Expectations
With so many variables, many unknown at the outset, it is impossible to know which way a path may go. What will be found in surgery that was not seen on imaging? How will your body respond – to surgery, to the hardware, to recovery? Are you a fast or slow healer? What if you have an allergy that wasn’t previously discovered? How do you do with surgery drugs? What is your reaction to pain? How about your mental state? Attitude and mental state have a massive impact on healing and recovery. What if you have an accident at home, maybe trip, bust a toe, fall on the surgical site, or who knows what? This list could go on and on because this is how life goes in general.
We cannot know and predict everything that might impact the healing journey. We can only take it as it comes, embrace it for what it is, and carry on, always moving forward with each new step.
There may be a proposed plan and predicted outcome:
- surgery will take x number of hours
- you will be prescribed x drugs
- bone healing will take x weeks
- you will need to be non weight bearing for x weeks
- hardware removal at x months
- etc.
But it is not a guarantee. Deviations from the expected are not failure, they are normal and an indicator that you are human. I wonder how many cases actually turn out, top to bottom, exactly textbook? Shoot, only 10% of babies are born on their due dates and that’s a normal, physiological progress, much more predictable than highly complicated, invasive surgery.
EXPECT THE UNEXPECTED!
The unexpected keeps life interesting. Both of my PAO surgeries turned out great. In and out, home in under 24 hours, no pain meds, up and moving on my own right away – really, nothing better could have come with those.
But, my scopes were different. Who would have guessed? Those seem like they would be the easy part. The actual work done inside the joints was nothing unusual, the difficulties came with the reaction the joint capsules had afterwards. Exceptionally rare. For months, then years, developing into full blown adhesive capsulitis of both hips, at the same time, requiring three more scopes to fix and get on a better path of healing. Only now are they starting to feel right, three years later. Success has definitely not been linear!
Hardware removal was a fun party for me – no anesthesia at all, cracking jokes, seeing each screw right after it came out, walking out the door afterwards. Totally weird, right? For some people they are sick from the anesthesia for days and need crutches because it is so painful. No one way is right or better, this just illustrates the extremes that can come with the simplest of procedures. And, it is impossible to know beforehand what anyone’s version of success will look like.
My pubic fusion surgery was done with such care and precision, I should have felt amazing afterwards, especially based on my previous recoveries. But it turns out I’m allergic to the metal, so it has been a rashy, irritated nightmare ever since. As a result, I, the one with an exceptionally strong mental outlook and attitude, have been counting the days until we can check for progress and finally take out the hardware. This very wait is what gave birth to this blog, one of my favorite opportunities of all.
My initial plan of needing to do just one hip turned into 3+ years and 12 surgeries. And who knows, I may get news that I need more – AND THAT’S OK! Whatever happens, it’s my path, my opportunity, my gift.
Life is Curvy
Observe yourself during your day today. For the whole day. Do you do everything absolutely as planned? Every action? When you empty the dishwasher, take a shower, doing laundry, getting out the door – how many times doing things you’ve done a million times do you forget something or stumble? “Oh, I forgot that one spoon back there. Oops, dropped the soap. Oh, there’s a sock stuck to the inside of the washer, no wonder I couldn’t find it. Dang it, I forgot my wallet!” Even opening a band-aid, darn wrapper stuck to your fingers. These fumbles happen ALL. DAY. LONG. Without us taking much notice.
These are examples of the curves of life. We are not robots, performing every task meticulously and perfectly. The day is a curvy, wiggly dance.
And these are simple things!
Healing and recovery is complex and curvy. We have to give ourselves a lot of grace and space for healing and recovery because success is absolutely not linear.
Embrace the Opportunities
A nonlinear path to success has many doors of opportunity along the way. Do you see yours? Setting down the load of upset and rigid expectation allows you to see them all, reframing the negatives into positives. Open the doors! Go in! Explore! My doors have included handling old life and family drama, confronting my self, and growing into the best version of myself. Without all of my extra time and meandering, non-linear path, I wouldn’t have had these opportunities. I am overhwhelmingly grateful and wouldn’t trade it in for a shorter, easier surgery/recovery path. My protracted path to success has been the greatest gift of it all.
Treasure Map
View the journey as a treasure map, filled with twists and turns, adventures, unexpected surprises, sea monsters, mermaids, the unknown – whatever you can imagine. What do you see along your path? Where can you spend time productively? Which expectations can you let go of? How can you embrace your path and claim it as your own? What does your treasure at the end look like?
Success is not linear – success is getting to the result no matter the path, AND making the most of every step of the journey.
Load up the PAO song and go claim your success!
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This is so true. Everything worth it takes times and there are always setbacks. Great reminder.