Appropriate Vegetable

Corn or Brussels sprouts? How about broccoli? Onions, carrots, peas, and cucumbers? Today we will mind our vegetables, Carey style. I’ll illustrate how I show up to life with the appropriate vegetable.

Ok, so what am I talking about??

This goes back a few months to another one of those weird hypnagogic moments. This one was an afternoon nap that I woke up from laughing out loud, trying to hold onto the excellent imagery that had bubbled up in my mind.

In this state, I had an image of corn and Brussels sprouts as representatives of how we listen to the ones we love – the idea that sometimes we want someone to simply listen, and other times we want advice or feedback.

Corn, whole ears of corn, symbolize being a listener only. This is appropriate when someone wants a sounding board but no feedback.

Brussels sprouts are compact nuggets of nutrition, so they represent information, ideas, and feedback. I imagine them being tossed my way, one by one, when I’m looking for a listener that also provides thoughts and feedback.

I shared this imagery with David and we’ve been using it ever since. One of us will come to the other with words similar to: “I have this idea.” “Listen to this.” “I want to share what happened today.” “I’m really upset by…” etc.

The next question always is:

“Do you want corn or Brussels sprouts?”

BOOM! So easy. It allows up to be clear on what we are looking for in the other and to be sure we are showing up as the appropriate vegetable.

Broccoli

Broccoli came my way a few weeks later as I was reading Anne Lamott’s Bird By Bird. She has a section titled “Broccoli” where she pulls in the Mel Brooks line “Listen to your broccoli, and your broccoli will tell you how to eat it.” In this case, broccoli is our intuition.

“It means, of course, that when you don’t know what to do, when you don’t know whether your character would do this or that, you get quiet and try to hear that still small voice inside. It will tell you what to do. The problem is that so many of us lost access to our broccoli when we were children. When we listened to our intuition when we were small and then told the grown-ups what we believed to be true, we were often either corrected, ridiculed, or punished. So you may have gotten into the habit of doubting the voice that was telling you quite clearly what was really going on. It is essential that you get it back.” – Anne Lamott, Bird By Bird

Now, when I feel stuck on something, I imagine myself listening to my broccoli. It is so silly that it works! Trust your broccoli.

Carrots

Carrots are supposedly good for the eyes, right? These represent clarity and embracing new points of view. When I find myself in disagreement, sometimes it is better to walk away to think about it for awhile. Go harvest some carrots, gain a new point of view, see things differently.

Onion

“Peel back the onion” is a common idiom, but I think of it similarly to unfurling. This is peeling off the layers of armor and protection, opening myself to being vulnerable. Things go much better when I drop my armor. This is the appropriate vegetable for a heart-to-heart conversation and times of owning my shizz.

Peas

Peas, like Brussels spouts, are tiny nuggets of nutrition. These to me are the seeds of new ideas. When I’m brainstorming, on the verge of a new idea, perhaps listening to my broccoli, I imagine myself shelling peas. I imagine opening each pod and discovering each new pea, releasing all of the new ideas.

Cucumber

“Cool as a cucumber,” another well known idiom, another appropriate vegetable. I have cucumber slices almost every day as an afternoon snack so this is a literal time of chilling out. Stressed, anxious, furrows in the brow? Go have some cucumbers.

I keep thinking of more but I’ll leave it at these, giving you room to come up with your own appropriate vegetables. SHARE them with me, please! They are fun, helpful, and awesome tools to share with kids. Totally silly, but Anne Lamott agrees so I’m running with it!

Bon appétit!

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