I’m going to challenge your view on obstacles and gifts today. You’ve seen me write about the obstacle being the way a lot already, but today I’m framing it in another, perhaps more accessible way.
The word “obstacle” elicits images of something difficult, heavy, challenging, demanding, work.
The word “gift” elicits images of joy, fun, free, easy, surprise, anticipation.
I’m going to challenge you to reframe every single obstacle as a gift and treat it as such. Move away from the feelings connected to the word “obstacle” and into the sensations associated with “gift”. Get excited when an obstacle arises because it is a gift!
A writer — and, I believe, generally all persons — must think that whatever happens to him or her is a resource. All things have been given to us for a purpose, and an artist must feel this more intensely. All that happens to us, including our humiliations, our misfortunes, our embarrassments, all is given to us as raw material, as clay, so that we may shape our art.
– Jorge Luis Borges
Obstacles in life are a given. The question is, what do we do with them? How do we choose to respond or react? Are we so rigidly set on our path that we fight them? Or, are we flexible and see the gifts that they bring, course corrections every one?
Let’s Go Bowling.
The goal with bowling is to get the ball down the lane to knock the pins down, avoiding the gutters. Since the game includes the gutters, these are not obstacles; obstacles are things that arise randomly, not things that are ever present, expected, or included.
The gutters are the long way around, similar to when we are working towards something but not in the most efficient way.
In bowling, bumpers are the obstacles. Bumpers are the random things life throws at us, gifts that pop up to help guide us on the best path towards the goal. They narrow the scope of the game, making it easier to get to where we want to go. The bumpers are the freebies. I don’t think anyone would argue whether or not bumpers make the game easier.
When viewed through a different lens, all of life’s obstacles are bumpers.
Every single obstacle that comes up is a course correcting bumper, helping to guide us on our correct path. The key is to recognize them as that, pay attention, and adjust rather than fight. Can you imagine a bowling ball fighting with a bumper to get through to the gutter? “I will get through! My trajectory put me on a path towards the gutter, so I will continue on that path, obstacle be damned!” It is absurd but that is what we do when we stubbornly stick to a plan and then encounter an obstacle, meeting it with rigidity.
It is easy to recognize bumpers as a gift, but do you see that they are actually obstacles? Choose a current obstacle and flip it into a gift. Can you do it?
Our obstacles are here to guide us, if we let them.
What if we set aside our preconceived ideas, well-crafted plans, egos, and narcissism and instead let each obstacle share its gifts with us? How much better would our lives be?
Everything is material. We can use it all. Just as issues we had with our parents become lessons that we teach our children, or an injury that lays us up in bed becomes a reason to reflect on where our life is going, or a problem at work inspires us to invent a new product and strike out on our own, so too can this crisis be something that allows us to move forward or grow.
– Ryan Holiday
Obstacles = Gifts
My greatest gifts have been my obstacles. My entire hip journey has led me to growing into the best version of myself. It has led me to sharing my story with you. I’ve stopped ramming against the bumpers and resolved 25 year old upset with my family. I’ve embraced humility and vulnerability – it is hard after insisting on some things for so long, but obstacles are always right and will continue to grow in size and intensity until we see them for what they are. Pay attention to the messages and gifts they bring!
We can either be made worse by events outside our control or made better. What will it be? We can try to purchase things at great expense—through our brilliance, through our raw determination, through good luck or whatever—or we can accept and utilize what we’ve been given for free. Which seems like a more cost effective strategy?
Life is going to give us a lot. A lot we don’t want. A lot we wouldn’t choose if we had a choice. All we can do is figure out a way to transform this into material. All we can do is put it into our character, put it into our work. All we can do is use what we get for free.
– Ryan Holiday
Obstacles are gifts. All we have to do is take a breath and look at them in that way, see what they offer, and then enjoy the gifts they bring. Sometimes they come in the strangest, “definitely wouldn’t want that” packages, but they are indeed gifts if we look more closely. They are a free pass to better and a better path to freedom.
Shine your ball and embrace life’s bumpers. The obstacle is the gift!
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